Faith Meets Doubt

"I sing a simple song of love. To my Savior, to my Jesus. I'm grateful for the things You've done, My loving Savior, my precious Jesus." By Kutless.

Such a simple song that reveals how simple things can bring honor, glory, and love to our Father God. Yet, one better, how simple it is to allow God to lavish His love upon us. My Redeemer, Rebuilder, Restorer, Daddy, and King- it is only to a God like you that I can give my praise. He bestows a love upon us that no one else can. He forgives us when no one else will. He accepts, and receives us where we are.

Why then do we condemn our doubts? Can our doubts not bring us closer to Him? Can doubts not help our times of unbelief?

To a friend whom we have just met we ask questions. We learn to trust them as we learn about them: their likes and dislikes. Yet, even when we have fully learned to trust them we still ask questions. We question the details we already know. If I said I loved purple someone may eventually ask what shade of purple.

It is the same in our relationship with God. We get to know His likes and dislikes through the Bible, the ten commandments, and through prayer. Sometimes we have questions, and sometimes we doubt. Should this be a negative thing? Absolutely not. Our passion for Christ comes from knowing Him deeper. We begin to know Him deeper by asking questions and 'talking' with Him.

I can not count how many times I have been told that there is no stupid question and I can not help but think that God says the same to us- His children! Why would He have His only Son die for us? A few people who doubted, Abraham (Genesis 12 & 15), Moses (Exodus 3:1-9 & 4), David (1 Samuel 27), John the Baptist (Matthew 11:2). Guess what? They are in the Bible. Then we have the disciples in Matthew 28:16 in verse 18 "but some doubted".

God knows our doubts and we tend to grow from them if bring them before God and ask Him to show us the way. He does not always tell us why. In fact, He did not tell John the Baptist 'why' but He did reassure Him.

It seems to me that our faith grows in the mist of doubt. In a previous entry I briefly mentioned my struggle with feeling loved. Not that I ever went without love, but I struggled in accepting love. I want to bond with the Father, I want to enter into a sonship with Him, and I want to enjoy what the Father enjoys! But. I am flawed. I have issues. I question. I sometimes feel unworthy, and unacceptable of His love. He proved my doubt wrong. He continues to prove my doubt wrong.

His love is simple, His love is strong, and His love is unimaginable and how shall I, of all people, respond to this type of love? I shall respond, though it may seem simple, with a song of love to my Savior,

my precious Jesus.

How shall I respond in the mist of doubt, when I feel unworthy, and when I struggle to accept His love? I shall respond by enjoying what He enjoys. I shall respond by loving others. I shall respond by allowing myself to enter into sonship. I shall respond by continuing to seek His will for my life.

To those of you that can somehow relate, know that it is okay to doubt. God will meet you where you are at. Yet, I warn you though- seek out the answers and avoid lingering with your doubt.

God Bless,
~Sherry~

Crazy!!!

It has seriously been a month today since I last wrote. That's a long time, but as I sit in my living room looking out towards a skyline bordered by the Rockies, well, I am more than happy to write.

The week of August 9th Tomek and Renia Bieniek from Poland were here to visit and I was blessed to hangout and talk with them on a couple of different occasions. The first was movie night at Rays where Tomek and I enjoyed some western classics. The second at my youth's Turner Falls retreat where we listened as Renia and Tomek taught us to do our best to think positively, and to be strong and courageous in the Lord.

During this past month I had to say goodbye to my boys and girls at the B&G Club in Valley View. That was actually really hard to do. It is always really neat to see that you had some form of influence on someone. It is always astounding when you get to say you left a positive influence on someone.

I refuse to say that I said goodbye to the Tambourine and Dance team at Cross Timbers though. I will, instead, say 'until next time my lovely ladies'! They have actually prepared a really cool looking dance for Sunday the 22nd! Don't miss it! These girls and the rest of the youth are actually conducting the service that day. Check them out.

A word for SCS. A business I have enjoyed working for so far had their Open House on Friday, August 13th. I was glad to be present. Mark Ford- the owner- had a lot of fun with it, and I can see him having even more. If you haven't checked out Sanger Computer Services (SCS) you should consider doing that as well.

Now here in Colorado I have completely moved in and won the game of Garbage (not the one we know in Valley View but an intriguing card game nevertheless.) My roommates are Laura (Ca), Kacie (NM), and Melanie (Tx), and we are loving it here.

There is so much going on and I am super glad I got to inform you of all that has and is going on.

God Bless You Guys

TTFN,
Sherry

My Daddy's Lap

After a month of discovering how to lay my pride by my side, and crawl into my Daddy's lap, I have discovered the answer to one daunting question. Let's first quickly recap.

About a month ago through the initiation of some respected adults in our church I finally saw the one thing that prevented me from accepting the love of my True Daddy; perfection. I developed a perverted view of myself and what I ought to be. I thought myself unworthy, and unacceptable of God's love; you see I began to feel as if I had to earn it. His response told me that I was indeed unworthy, unacceptable, and even undeserving of His love, but because He first loved me and desired that I walk with Him and love Him too He sent His son to die for me. What a personal love my Daddy wants to show me!

The Q&A on my journey was revealed to me last Friday night, again, at the Anding's house through none other than my Pastor. (He won't ever know unless he decides to read this.) He put it this way; "What does God want from me? God wants our heart."

With it being as simple as that to walk with Him in grace. Romans 6:14 says, "For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace." I am choosing not to bondage myself in laws of perfection and regulation. My Daddy advised against it!

We are set free, therefore, I say we act like it. Which is why I was blessed to attend camp with the kids of Cross Timbers at Dry Gulch, USA. I loved it. Absolutely nothing beats looking across that auditorium and seeing young kids lift their hands in praise and know exactly what they are doing! What an inspiration and a blessing to witness.

It is also why one of my Youth Leaders, Mark Ford, was boxed in an attacked a swarm of youth with water balloons immediately after youth last Sunday night.

Indeed, we are privileged to live a life of truth and freedom. God has set us free, and we are 'free indeed'. Let us make the most of each moment. Especially since this summer is starting to just slip through my fingers and there is absolutely no stopping it.

~Walk in Grace~